More Creepy Roomates

direct from craigslist, if ya didn’t know:

• We have two awesome girl cats (Poem & Lady) — And I just threw up on my computer.
• People with dreams of art or music or helping the world appreciated. Realities also welcome. In Prospect Height near the museum, the botanic garden, the park, the sky. Closet built into the wall can store multiple people.  (No pets, though animals are a joy, too!). — I couldn’t pick a favorite part of this one.  It’s all so great.
• My partner and I are offering this INSANELY reduced rent because we would like to maintain access to the bedroom in question to host BDSM gatherings and have photo/video shoots. Nothing illegal, pornographic, and absolutely no sex will take place in your living space. We will not ask you to participate, only to shift to another room from time to time, and we will thoroughly clean the room every time we use it. This is ideal for a college student or somebody who works full time. — Um, I don’t think is ideal for anybody. Even if the BDSM gatherings were in the living room, I feel like that’s not ideal, nevermind in my bedroom.
• Of course, this is the one I’m actually taking: Room is on the 4th floor, which is completely empty at nights and most of the day except on weekends when the owners of the building teach Chinese Elementary school kids from the neighborhood. — So who am I to judge?

-David